Tuesday, August 31, 2010

Commentary

With the winter months approaching and more and more guys putting there bikes away in favor of a warm fire and a fat chick an issue needs to be addressed. There is a breed of man out there who continues to ride his bike on the weekends from poker run to bar to Harley dealerships repeat. This man is fearless he is bold and his palms are never cold. Not only do his "Do Rag" and his Harley jeans make sure you know he is a biker. Even his bitch fell off 2008 Daytona hoodie and all important chaps all serve a purpose. No I am not mad about his fashion statements nor the fact that he doesn't know an ironhead from a shovelhead. Nor I am even pissed that he thinks Harley's are the only motorcycle on the planet.
This week I have chosen to write about a curiosity something that perplexes me and my friends. This function over form accessory that makes me say um? What is it you may ask? It is the all important and too commonly seen FINGERLESS GLOVES. Why? Why fingerless gloves? Does one not care about his fingers? Are fingers not important enough to shield from outside elements? What purpose does having a glove with no fingers serve? If I wear pants without legs they serve a purpose (too cool me off) and are called shorts. Shoes without laces? Why also oh biker dude do you not take off said gloves after parking your bike? Are your palms still cold? Is it to be able to pick your nose? To finger the bitch that fell off? Why no fingers in the gloves? Is it because we could have forgotten in spite of the chaps the jeans the do rag and the orange Boothill 2007 t shirt that you were/are a biker? "Dude is that guy a biker over there?" "Wait let me see his hands.... yes yes he is a biker he has on fingerless gloves!!!!" I dont understand it. Is it because we are all sheep who follow the masses? Since cool dude has them I must too. Please stop the madness. Your fingers deserve it. Wear gloves that fit or no gloves at all but dont wear half gloves. You stopped wearing cut off t-shirts after you stopped playing football in highschool right? So stop wearing cut off gloves. Say no to fingerless gloves. This has been a public service announcement. Now go fuck yourself. BHFFBH

3 comments:

Violentchoppers said...

LOVE IT!

dustyshmo said...

owwww crap ola i need to sew the finger tips back onto my gloves . . . real men wear mittens anyhow !!!!

trashy blond said...

too funny! I been participating in and watching the whole biker phenomenon for about 30 years. It cracks me up to watch these posers.